Note to self: If i reread my posts on a regular basis, i might even learn something! I forgot that i did the laundry ERP so well and went back to the laundry + shower method. But then these past 2 months have been crazy.
Note to readers: Writing posts about OCD happenings is like having to relive them again- in slow motion. So it takes me time to do that without feeling all the YUK factor involved in stuff like finding and cleaning up after mice. Because there was more to that story than i told. I just wanted to wait until I wasn't upset anymore. And that has taken awhile.
Day 3 happened when the exterminators came to the house to put A+++ poison in so I will never have this problem again here. Lesson learned years ago at our first house when I first tried humane traps, then killing traps and they still returned/ weren't all gone. Then out came the big guns. No more mice!
So even though it's expensive, we got the exterminators in. Problem was- the exterminators! First they sat on the ledge right by my garbage cans (EWW). Then they sounded THRILLED that we had a mouse problem. Maybe thrilling for THEM, for me- not so much. Then they touched stuff. (Who knows where they'd been or what they touched before they got to my house??) I had to leave. I took the dogs and drove to the end of the street- a long country lane, crying. I just couldn't take it anymore.
After a short cry i went for a walk to try to feel better. And it worked. I tried to focus on the day and what i was seeing, not what was happening back at my house. Mindfulness helped me get back on my feet and feel i could handle whatever happened at home.
Bruce had put a piece of tape everywhere they had touched and i only had to wipe those areas. He also told them i had OCD, so they then understood not to just touch stuff. That was nice of them! I thought that was the end of the story. Not so.
A week or so later, one of the dogs pulled the mouse bait out of the closet where it had been hidden. So then i was worried that some of the poison had been dragged onto the carpet and stuff laying on the floor in the playroom. Playroom now out of bounds until i 'cleaned' it up. Which i did one Saturday morning. We threw out that poison container. I don't like poison where kids play! And the dog must have sniffed it out. Fortunately it is made so that animals and kids can't get at the poison right away. But cleaning that area was another 'BIG EVENT'. It didn't seem to bother Bruce that the dog had dragged the poison out of there. But i kept seeing tiny bits of poison falling out of the container, then being picked up by fingers playing with toys on the floor. (getting a bit creeped out as i write this.)
Only mouse thing remaining: THE CLOSET. There was some found in the playroom closet (that used to be our bedroom). However it was only found after i was cleaning it out. It was under the shoe rack. Not a problem. Just clean the shoe rack and any shoes on it. Some work, but afterwards, every thing is fine. Except that i had dropped some clothes at least once, and i don't remember whether or not it was in the closet, over the shoe rack. If it was, then some of the clothes parts could have fallen onto the floor, right? Right onto the mouse poop pieces. But i didn't know about that while i was moving the clothes, so i just picked them up from wherever they fell and hung them upstairs in our new bedroom. So when i discovered the 'gift' from the mice, i didn't know what to do. I didn't want to wash ALL the clothes in the closet, as some of them are suits that have to be dry cleaned and if i skipped them, it would be pointless. Not to mention all the extra work of doing so many loads of laundry 'in case' something touched the clothes. So I have just ignored all the clothes in the closet and don't wear them.
One night i discussed this with my dh and Bruce said that #1. the clothes rack was against the walls of the closet, so no clothes would have gotten behind or beside the rack where the stuff was. # 2. it didn't matter to him anyway. Number 1 i could process. Except the shoe rack was made of wire, not closed boards. But i could see how the clothes would just bunch up on top of the wire or dangle in front, where there was no stuff ( or i'd have seen it laying there). So logically it makes sense to wear the clothes and not worry. Unfortunately i haven't done so yet. Humph.
Other things happening in the past month: Bruce's dad was very ill- death-bed kind, so we went down to see him. While we were down south we stopped in to see my parents. Which was a good thing because the next Monday ( Oct. 6) my dad passed away unexpectedly in his sleep. So we spent the week in Burlington. I presented the eulogy/ life sketch of my dad because i couldn't sleep Monday night and spent the night writiing one in my head, while trying to fall asleep! So i figured, might as well use it. Good thing I've gone to Toastmasters, as i have learned to be comfortable with standing and introducing myself and having people looking at me.
Then the next week i found out that someone had gotten hold of my credit card numbers or something and went on a night out in Toronto. So i had to deal with that. Then last Sunday one of our dogs was puking all over the living room all day. Monday she had surgery. They found sharp pieces of plastic in her stomach that had cut the gut in many places. That will cost us over 2 grand! And the dog is 10 or 11 yrs old! So she has been at the vet's all week, but is making good progress. So what will be this week's event? Add cloudy, rainy gray days to all this and my month has kind of sucked.
Friday, October 03, 2014
I received an email today from Lauri at OCDCT.org. She asked if i would promote their conference. So here goes:
FOR INDIVIDUALS WITH OCD AND FAMILY MEMBERS
OCTOBER 18, 2014
9:00 AM - 2:00 PM
YALE NEW HAVEN
CHILD STUDY CENTER
WHAT IS IT & WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT IT?
DR. CHRISTOPHER PITTENGER, M.D., Ph.D.
DR. MICHAEL BLOCH, M.D., M.S.
COGNITIVE BEHAVIORAL THERAPY (CBT) &
EXPOSURE RESPONSE PREVENTION (ERP):
WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE & WHY DOES IT WORK?
AMY CAWMAN, LCSW
BREAKOUT SUPPORT GROUP SESSIONS FOR
AND FAMILY MEMBERS
DR. CHRISTINA TAYLOR, Ph.D.,
DR. DIANE SHOLOMSKAS, Ph.D.,
HEIDI GRANTZ, LCSW
DR. DENIS SUKHODOLSKY, Ph.D.
AMY CAWMAN, LCSW
For more info go to http://www.ocdct.org/ to register.
I won't be attending as i live at least a 10 hour drive away- In another country, to boot. But I wish my family could go.
This would be a wonderful event to take along those family members who don't know much about ocd and are to busy to read up on it. They would get good information and this may help them to help the person with ocd. At least it would put OCD in the realm of medical disorder, and out of imaginary illness.