So i went out tonight to pick up all the dirty paper towels that the birds had strewn around. Only i didn't know how to do it without stepping on areas that might have been touched by the paper towels as they blew along on the ground. So i took off my shoes and since they were summery and open i pulled off my socks too and threw them in the garbage can with the shoes and the paper towels. But there was no bag to take the bin to the house with (since i didn't want to touch it with my ocd-ish hands). I washed really well and changed into pj's but still had ocd-ish feelings of being dirty. i put clean sox on too cause i had to walk back to the house in my bare feet. Well, i sure learned the hard way how NOT to put out the garbage.... At least i didn't have a shower, altho i wanted to really, really really badly. still do.
Ocd has cost me lots of money in things i throw out. :(
I also spent a lot of time while reading this morning tearing up.
Tomorrow is the day before my next therapy appt. I am supposed to have gone into Value Village ( a used clothing store) as my next ERP. I don't know if i'll be doing that. If i feel tomorrow like i felt today and like i feel tonight i won't have the energy to do it.
Ocd sucks.
Ocd has also cost me a lot of money for all the things I've thrown out thru the years!
ReplyDelete