Last week at group meeting I noticed that I was rather quiet- could n't speak much. I was asked to 'tell about myself' to the new members of the group and I was so stunned that I couldn't remember anything about myself! My mind went blank. The facilitator had to prompt me by asking me to tell what brought me to the group. That direct quection was easy to answer. That was the extent of my talking. Except to say that I didn't do my goal of starting a conversation with a stranger. Another group member even commented on how quiet I was. All I said was something simple like 'I know'.
This meeting was in the middle of my FIL's visit and while I ''seemed' ok ( I didn't have physical symptoms of stress like sweating and such) I realized that my mind going blank and my inability to talk much must be MY way of showing my stress.
We have to tell everyone what our stress level for the week was ( between 1-100) and I said 45-50. So I actually took note of my stress level and then noticed the fact that I was non-vocal. I knew that talking is not my thing until I get to know someone well or get really comfortable. But this time I really noticed how much my verballness and my anxiety are related. Because I'm pretty comfortable at the meeting, so it wasn't 'fear' I was feeling- the normal anxiety people get when put in with a new group of people, so this must be related to my stress level.
I'll ask about this at the meeting this week.
I get quiet, too. Sometimes, when I'm just done with stressful social situations (pretty much any social situation can be the one pushing me over the limit), I can feel myself shutting down, at least verbally. It gets harder to talk. Harder to break the barrier between silence and my voice speaking. I think you are on the right track seeing it as related to stress. I think for me, it isn't quite strait stress, it also has to do with me using up my reserve endurance.
ReplyDeleteI get more quiet, too. I'm quiet anyway until I get to know someone, but I'm quiet with everyone when I've been real anxious for a while. I think I just get tired and can't think of anything to say.
ReplyDeleteHey that's cool, Karin. Nothing wrong with just sitting in a group and listening. I think the important thing is that you went. You had a lot going on at home and that was probably all you could do for that time period. And you know what? That's ok. Give yourself a break!
ReplyDeleteI am quiet too when I'm stressed unless I know the person or people really well and then my racing thoughts spill out.
ReplyDeleteI'm like you in group situations though. Quiet and people think I'm a quiet person.